THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
