We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
He better not be in your backpack
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
