so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
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I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
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I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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