sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Floor bacon is actually really good
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
