Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize
