I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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