She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
