we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
