miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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