I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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