Just cropdusted the office
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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