i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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