Well apparently he's into motor boating.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
