who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Boobs are out for the taking
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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