thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize