if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize