Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
im holly from the hills drunk
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
