told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
