I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
