i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize