I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
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