don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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