we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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