Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
