Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
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