There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
