i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
