I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
