So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
