I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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