Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.