The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
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