In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
