Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
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Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
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I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
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