She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
