AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
