Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize