Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
My Higher Power is John Stamos
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
