Tell her she can't have a vagina
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Randomize