I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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