its not stalking. its research.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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