had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
