goodnight i made you a song goodbye
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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