we have pet lesbian snakes
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize