Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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