Three words: puerto rican gang bang
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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