she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
