dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Randomize
