Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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