Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize