if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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