I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
